Divorce is a difficult process, even if you and your spouse agree it is the right course of action. However, the separation, divorce and its aftermath may take a heavy toll on your children.
The fear of abandonment among young children is an issue parents need to alleviate during a divorce. Otherwise, it may manifest as anger, frustration and hurt. When you and your spouse decide to set up two households, keeping your children at the forefront of the process is critical to a smooth transition.
Speak kindly
Even in an amicable split, you may face challenging moments that elicit an emotional response. One of the most important things for you to keep in mind is that your children are always listening. Speaking negatively about their other parent is going to feed into their anxiety and fear. Do not use negative terms or tones when talking about the other parent.
Attend events
While your time with the children will decrease, it does not mean you should withdraw from attending events or activities. Even if it is not your parenting time, show up to conferences, performances and birthday parties. Doing this shows your children that you are still with them, even when they are in the custody of the other parent.
Ask for help
If your breakup is difficult, you may need emotional support to get through it. This should not come from your children. They are going through their own difficulties, and as such, therapy may prove beneficial for you and them.
It is possible to divorce without leaving a negative impact on your children. Maintaining effective communication with them and their other parent may prove key to setting your children up for success.
